Sunday, October 11, 2009

Forgetful

I was saying to a friend the other day I can't believe how forgetful I am. Everyday, or at least nearly every day, I forget how good God is. How faithful He is.

A week ago I struggled through days of feeling beat up. Mercy Ships is a boot camp of sorts. While here, I have been subjected to such emotional, mental, and spiritual stress. Its not as if I can escape it either. Its hard to sneak away for a cup of tea and a book, never mind a day away or a walk into town without being the center of every persons attention. I understand its all part of the package, I get that there are lessons to be learned, I acknowledge the fact God is at work. Sometimes I just want life to pause, or better yet, be able to press fast forward through some parts.
Everyone has been buzzing about how we only have 7 weeks left here in Benin. Those of us who have been here the whole time are tired, we are preparing for the end with still a chunk of time to go.
Last week I was ready, I was dreaming about how good it would feel to sleep without thoughts of patients, to relax and come out of over drive.
Then one phone call started a sequence of events that leaves me smiling, excited to get 7 more precious weeks here in this country I have called home since March.

I wanted to check in on Luc, one of our Burkitt's lymphoma patients. This type of cancer spreads quickly and claims children's lives at an alarming rate here in Africa. It is also treatable and 80% of kids respond really well to the chemotherapy. Luc is one of those kids.
We were going to be seeing him on Friday at the ship for some bloodwork so I figured a quick call would be fine early in the week to make sure he was doing ok. My translator made the call and hung up.
"I spoke to Luc's father. He is feeling fine, he started school today."
I could have cried. Little Luc, loving, sweet, shy, Luc. The image of him in a uniform on his first ever day of school made my heart ache. Its likely he would have died by now had he not come to the ship for treatment.
Wow, God. Thank you.

Baby Anicette, a sweet cleft lip/palate patient was on our feeding program for months without gaining enough weight. It looked like she wasn't going to have her surgery and with nothing less than a miracle my favorite baby in Benin gets to keep her appointment for the first week of November.
With only a month around Christmas time to be home and get everything done, I emailed my old boss to ask if she could put me in touch with our oncology floor. I am working on a project and it would be ideal for me to take a course in chemotherapy in order to best do my job next year. Within hours the nurse educator from a different floor had emailed me to tell me some dates of classes. I was touched by her effort, especially towards someone she had never met. I wrote back to say I wouldn't be home for the given dates, thanks anyways, and were there any other resources she could point me towards. Again, within hours, she wrote back asking "if we change the dates of the course would you be able to make it?"
Umm, yes?
I wasn't shocked, Children's Hospital Boston is unlike any other place I have ever been associated with. The people there are just plain good. They are kind, considerate, and ridiculously helpful (even to strangers, as evidenced by this woman). I wasn't shocked, but I was touched beyond what I can explain.
By Friday this week I was overwhelmed by God.
I Love you, Suzanne. I love you so much.

Today I joined in the fun of watching a world cup qualifying soccer match between Ghana and Benin. We didn't get attacked by an angry mob, or hit with the flying billy-clubs used by angry police. We didn't get stuck outside the gates because of the over-selling of seats, and we got to celebrate (loudly) when Benin won 1-0. I was truly happy walking through the frenzy of fans after the game, I got a glimpse of why I love Africa so much, how fun it is that this is home right now.
When I got back and checked my email I found an incredibly sweet note of encouragement from a friend I haven't talked to in ages. It made me smile realizing how God orchestrates every single detail in life. Not a moment goes by without Him knowing. He is so good.

All of it, the joy, the pain, I'm thankful for all of it. Some days (and weeks) I forget that God is in control. Then there are the weeks where God shows His unmistakable grace with me. He fills me with inexplicable joy and instances where I can't deny Him.
James 1:2-4
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

“Dwell Deep”
His thoughts said, My longing is to heal the broken and the weak, to defend the maimed, and to lead the blind unto the sight of the glory of the Lord. My choice is to be a corn of wheat and fall into the ground and die. Then why these waverings?
His Father said, Too much of thy surface is exposed to the breath of every wind that bloweth. Thou must learn to dwell deep.
Then the Son who had wavered answered humbly, Renew within me a settled spirit. Establish me with Thy directing Spirit. My heart is fixed O God, my heart is fixed. I will sing and give praise.

Amy Carmichael – His thoughts said... His Father said...