Part 2- Decision Made!

I write today with a heart full of excitement and peace, whew!! Its been quite a process to get here but I am happy to be where I am and thank God for His faithfulness. The email I received last week was from the coordinator for my placement through Mercy Ships asking me to consider working as a palliative care nurse rather than a post-operative nurse while on the ship. Basically this means I would be giving hospice (end of life) care to people suffering from fatal diseases (i.e. HIV/AIDS). This includes education for families and communities, and also means my work will be off the ship rather than as a surgical nurse on the ship. I will still be living on the ship but working primarily with people and families in the surrounding areas.
As I mentioned in Part 1, every single expectation I had up until that email was gone, wiped away. In talking with my best friend (who was also a bit speechless) she put it well. I was confused at what I was feeling, unable to form words or sentences and she said "Basically you just left the expectation of bringing life to people for a year to finding yourself helping people die for a year". The thoughts following that were incredible and pivotal in this process. Mercy Ships brings "Hope and Healing to the forgotten poor". My picture of healing were the examples of people with major tumors, cleft palates, fistulas, and club feet walking out after being "healed" of their deformities. Here is where God stepped in (well, He was always there of course, but this is the point where I heard Him softly remind me of something). At some point I took off my "nurse" hat and cried when I realized this: People facing imminent death are in dire need of hope and healing, especially so if they don't know Jesus as their savior. I saw Beth Moore speak last week (Gods timing is ridiculous, seriously) and she spoke about how there is life in death. More so, when we die to ourselves, Christ is able to live through us. I prayed over and over to help me die to anything I still held onto, things I wasn't even sure I was still holding on to, and then I got that email 3 days later.
In thinking about giving care at the end of someones life, what better example then being able to share with them that they can LIVE a new life, one without disease, poverty, or sorrow, all after they die. By dying to my expectations and selfish desires to be comfortable on the ship as a post-op nurse, God can use me bring the hope and healing to these people who need it so much.
:side note: as someone who doesn't cry very easily this process is a serious emotional roller coaster, in a good way!! :)
Following my spiritual "inventory" on Saturday morning I was mentally exhausted. This exhaustion was mostly from trying to even fathom how incredible God's work in my life has, is, and will continue to be. The scripture about how His love defies our knowledge is so true and I am humbled by it every time I try to even come close to understanding. I decided to give up on being productive and succumb to an afternoon of reading. I have been reading about the history of Mercy Ships and again found myself crying over some of the pictures in the book, and was especially struck by one of them that shows a line of somewhere around 5,000 people waiting to be seen on a screening day. These people come out and wait (and wait, and wait) to be seen with hopes of receiving free surgery and to be healed. Unfortunately, many of these people have to be turned away and sometimes it is because they are too sick to even survive surgery. Guess what? That's why they decided to create a Hospice team! I seriously should not be so shocked every time these things happen. During Saturday alone I was shown lessons in faith, one, after the other, after the other. This my friends, is why I started this post with how I am thankful for Gods faithfulness, it does not fail...ever.
So I emailed my contact and said yes, I would be honored to be considered for the position of palliative care nurse, quite excited really.
I must mention this in closing. One of my favorite things about God (if you can have favorite "things" regarding the creator of the universe?!) is I believe He is a creative God and maybe even has a sense of humor. I have been telling people that I thought it was really cool that Mercy Ships has big white Land Rovers with their logo on the side. I was finding myself LOVING the idea of driving one of them, even thinking about finding someone with a manual car so I could brush up on my stick-shift skills, just in case I ever had the opportunity to drive one while there. I was going through my new job description list mentally checking off things that applied to me. At the end of the list I laughed out loud when I read this:

-Ability and Willingness to drive in West Africa

Its as if God winked at me and said "See Suzanne, I KNOW you"

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."