Friday, June 5, 2009

Its that time again!




Matters of the Heart
After three months I must say I have embraced my new home and settled into the organized chaos that is the “norm” of life in Africa. With that, I have been going back and forth with what to write in these newsletters. Do people want to hear the facts? Or experience my journey with me through stories? The answer may be that I’ll change it up from month to month, but for now, I have story I would love to share with all of you. One which I hope will touch your heart as it has mine.

For a week or so I wasn’t feeling well. It wasn’t anything serious, just a bug that made its presence known on the ship, and put a few people out of commission for a bit. I missed work on Wednesday one week, which resulted in missing a visit with one of our pediatric patients, Enock. Enock has lymphoma, a tumor in his neck that we told him a few months ago could not be treated by our teams. In my absence, I sent along a card that was made by a child back home.
(My church’s Sunday school class made cards with scripture verses on them before I left, to give to the kids here.) At the end of the day, as I returned to my cabin, I found a “get well” card stuck to my door from Enock. When he heard I wasn’t feeling well, he decided he wanted to make a card for me too. I smiled, and was so touched at how sweet his gesture was. Later that night I looked over to the card, tacked to my wall, and was overcome with emotion. I allowed myself to cry. I cried for Enock, I cried to God, and I cried about the fact that a little 7 year old boy with a terminal disease, living in a third world country, is making ME a “get well” card. I have always thought that I wouldn’t be able to do pediatric oncology. Every nurse has her area of avoidance, and working with kids who have cancer is one those areas that affect me deeply. I really struggle with it. This single action by a little boy has invaded my heart, which in all honesty, is thrilling and scary all at once. I have never felt so alive, so devastated, and so joy-filled simultaneously.

Romans 15:13 (The message)
“May the God of hope fill you up with joy, fill you up with peace, so that your believing lives, filled with energy of the holy spirit, will brim over with hope “

This month I have let my patients and their families settle deep into my routine, my life, and my heart. Most days, I am saturated with the love that emanates from the people here. It is hard to avoid the serious faces on the people as we drive down the street, but people may not realize, there is a smile waiting just beneath those stoic faces, ready to be revealed. There are days my cheeks ache from smiling, I’m not sure I can think of anything better than that. This month
has also presented its challenges. OK, that’s an understatement. I recognize that with each challenge, there is a decision that has to be made; to grow and learn, or withdraw. Please continue to pray that I constantly draw on strength from God to face these circumstances, that I can find a balance, and that I am amazed daily at the power of prayer. I have so many tangible, real instances of answered prayer here. I am honored to have a front row seat watching Gods work in Africa; it truly is the experience of a lifetime. The fact that I am here supported by all of you, in so many ways and prayed for everyday makes my heart swell with emotion. I have a patient who said she prayed for God to ease her burden. She told us God sent us to share her sorrow, to help carry her burden, like He promises to do for all of us. In return, we always
remind her how much we gain from sharing in her joy, it’s infectious. I never feel alone here. Many of you share my joy and also my burdens; you don’t know how much that means to me. I look forward to what the next month will bring!

Sincerely,
Suzanne
Suzanne1337.blogspot.com | Suzanne.zickell@gmail.com
Micah 6:8 “What does the Lord require of you? To act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.”

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