My sunshine

You know the song, it happens to be one of my favorites. The first time I sang it to a baby, a nurse was trying to place an IV in her foot. The mom, dad, myself, and the IV nurse all sang to a 6 month old who ceased crying, and plainly looked at all the goofballs surrounding her. I nearly cried that first time (actually, I probably did). I knew I was doing exactly what I was meant to.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

you make me happy when skies are grey

you'll never know, dear, how much I love you

please don't take my sunshine away

I sang it again to baby Hubert a few days before he died. We had brought him for a chest xray and the cold plate underneath him, paired with me holding his small arms over his head was just too much for him. His crying subsided as I sang, tears freely falling down my own cheeks.

The other night, dear, as you lay sleeping

I dreamt I held you in my arms

When I awoke, dear, you were not with me

so I hung my head and cried

My attitude today, and really if I'm honest, over the last few days, has been totally crappy. I'm tired, I'm overwhelmed, I'm blah, blah, blah. I asked myself what I could write about. What do you say when all you hear in your own head are complaints?

Then I thought about Maurice, my favorite kid in Benin (and you thought nurses weren't allowed to have favorites. Newsflash: we totally do). I wanted to give an update, which I will (eventually), but for now I want to share the latest pictures with my favorite 5 year old taken this week. My sunshine.

Sometimes you need to dwell on your thoughts, deal with your emotions. Sometimes, though, once in a while, you need to get over yourself and realize that each day is a gift.

Thank you, God.